"The Story"

I am recording this birth story mostly for my own benefit to remember this experience!

The few days leading up to induction I was feeling nervous. Anxious. And I couldn't pinpoint an exact reason. I just knew that I was nervous for the labor and delivery of this little guy. When I told Rob I was nervous he listed concerns far past labor and delivery like having three kids to take care of, how is Ella going to react, etc. My concerns were much more immediate. What is going to happen to get this guy here?

The few hours leading up to going to the hospital felt like an eternity but then we arrived, got checked in, into a gown, and the first round of induction gels began. She said it would take hours for me to start feeling strong contractions so Rob actually went back home to sleep for a few hours.

Everything from there on out was severely complicated because of one word---polyhydromnios. Excess amniotic fluid. And is it turns out a severe amount of excess fluid.

They could not keep a heartrate on the baby in the womb the whole labor because of the excess fluid. There was a nurse in my room every 10 minutes trying to keep his heartbeat on the monitors.

Then the next morning we start pitocin. Then after 6 excrutiating hours of contractions about every minute finally an epidural. The next few hours of epidural rocked my universe---in a good way. Then, it slowly starts to fade in its effectiveness.

We hit being in the hospital for 24 hours and were nowhere near having a baby. I was still at a 1, despite contracting every minute or two consistently for 14+ hours at this point. Another long excrutiating night. Another night of sending Rob home to sleep.

Finally Sunday morning at 6am, 35 hours after checking in my water broke but the baby was still high. He had not dropped because of the excess fluid.  Still having contractions every minute or two. Feeling more and more pain as time goes on. Called Rob who didn't answer his phone. Had to call my mom and he came running back to the hospital like the baby was on the way out. After he got there and calmed down, he fell back asleep on the couch for a few more hours....despite me crying out in pain and agony as I had virtually no pain medication at this point and had been in labor for 36+ hours. 

Finally, I am screaming in agony and decided Rob needed to be awake to experience this lovely pain with me so I threw the only thing I could reach at his head...a wet washcloth. That finally snapped him awake because me screaming in pain or screaming his name had no effect on waking him up.

So, finally around 9am they decide to prep for delivery and have me start pushing. It took me around 10 minutes to push Lily and Ella out so that is what I was prepared for. Little did I know what the next hour and fifteen minutes would be like for me.

Even writing this out, it all seems so...trivial...or small...or just another experience. This whole experience was so hard, so many little complications, such a long process, such a lonely process it is hard for me to even write about it.

So, they bring in a doctor to deliver me that I had never met because my doctor left 30 minutes before and wasn't coming back. Awesome.

They get me all prepped, I am feeling an incredible amount of pain and had no pain meds helping me out at this point. He was still high and sunny side up. 30 minutes later we had made little progress. He was coming, slowly but surely and I was losing any energy I had left and started weeping between contractions that I was so exhausted. I kept praying constantly hoping for some divine help to push that baby out because I wasn't sure I had enough left in me to get him out on my own.

Another ten minutes. Small progress made.  At this point they bring out "the bar" (picture an ancient torture device) and reconfigure my bed. Now I am supposed to pull my body up on this bar supporting my whole weight, squat and push this baby out. Getting my body into that position was excruciating. And, then they kept trying to make me sit back between contractions. Just rearranging my position was so exhausting I had nothing left to give to push. Finally I started to feel him come out a tiny bit. At this point I had been pushing for an hour. The nurse tried to make me sit back and I started screaming at her. I had reached my limit. I was going to stay in that position until that baby was on the outside, even if it killed me. And, to be honest I felt like that was a distinct possibility at that point.

I have never felt such anguish, such pain, such pressure. I was determined to stay there until he came out. And finally at 10:13am he came out...39 hours and 13 minutes after we started this labor. I was shaking so bad I couldn't even think, comprehend that he was here. I just felt so defeated and exhausted and........I don't even know what. Shock.

The Dr said afterward that I looked surprised that I actually got him out. To be honest..I was surprised that I survived and that the baby was on the outside.

It took me hours and hours to stop shaking.